


Not About Trust

by shinkonokokoro



Category: Merlin - Fandom
Genre: Friendship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-28
Updated: 2011-04-28
Packaged: 2017-10-24 04:25:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/258987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinkonokokoro/pseuds/shinkonokokoro
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin knows he should tell Arthur. But he can't. Not yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not About Trust

"Arthur!"

The man looked up from packing his bag, a mild expectant expression like he'd seen it all before on his face. Of course, he had. But that was besides the point. "Yes, Merlin?"

"Were you not going to tell me about this? Just let poor Merlin come to your room expecting a crabby prince to wake, only to find him gone? Oh, where's Arthur? You didn't hear? He jaunted off to the Northern kingdoms for a treaty meeting. A _treaty_ meeting."

Arthur returned to his packing. "You're not needed, Merlin."

He tried to ignore the flash of hurt. "What, you can't be seen with me in the Northern kingdoms? Too—"

"Oh shut up, Merlin," Arthur rolled his eyes. "You're making too big a deal out of this as it is."

Gritting his teeth, Merlin took another step forward. "You're not going without me."

"Listen, last time I checked, _I_ was the prince, and you were the manservant. I'm pretty sure this means I give the orders."

"Fine, fine, _Sire_. But I'm coming with you."

"Merlin, this is just a short stay. I won't—"

"I'm not being left behind," he repeated stubbornly. "What if something goes wrong! And knowing you, no offence, _Sire_ , but it usually does—"

"Then what?" Arthur finally faced him, impatient and irritated, hands on his hips. "Then what, Merlin. What will you do. _Rescue_ me?"

"Listen," Merlin continued doggedly. "I can handle myself with a sword. You've seen me. And one more sword arm couldn't hurt! They'll never expect it! Besides! I'm good at getting out of tied hands!"

"Merlin," Arthur warned. "You're not going. Now get out."

Growling, Merlin grabbed his sleeve. " _Arthur_. I know you don't need to listen to me, but I... I _need_ to go with you."

"Do you know something, Merlin?" Arthur asked, raised eyebrow declaring his scepticism.

"No! That's not the point, gods, _Ar_ thur." Merlin closed his eyes, dropping Arthur's arm and took a deep breath. "Arthur."

"Yeeees, Merlin?"

"Stop that. This is..." Another deep breath. "I have a secret. Hold on. That I can't tell you. Don't! Don't get angry. It has nothing to do with not trusting you. Because I do. I trust you with my life. With everything, Arthur. This is about not forcing you to make a choice if the time comes. Even if I am mistaking my own importance. But I can't risk it. I'll tell you someday. I promise you that. On my mother's life. I promise. But for now. I can't. So... I need to come with you, Arthur because my first goal is and always will be your safety. And I _can protect_ you. You have to trust me on this. Can you? Will you? You know me and I never want to lie to you, but..." He shrugged feeling a bit wrecked under Arthur's piercing stare.

"That's quite the speech, Merlin." Arthur said. Quiet. Flat.

"Will you let me come with you? Because if you don't I'll still come, I have-"

Arthur waved a hand, putting on his magnanimous-for-Merlin face. "Go get packed."

Merlin felt his face split in two, grinning. He rushed to the door, stopping when Arthur called his name.

"I could make you tell."

"No, Sire. You couldn't," Merlin whispered. "I'm sorry, but you couldn't."

"I could give you the choice. Tell me or leave. Tell me or be banished. Tell me or I'll put you in the stocks for a week. Tell me or—"

"And I would do any of those things, Arthur, except for tell you at this moment. I _will_ tell you when the time is right." He met Arthur's eyes and gave him a subdued smile.

Arthur must have seen the resolve in his eyes because he sighed and shook his head, the fight leeching out of him. "I trust you, Merlin; gods help but I do."

"Thank you, Sire." Merlin gave him a perfect bow and a smile. "Thank you." And left to pack for the northern kingdoms, frought with monsters and bandits, grimacing to himself, but pleased from his head to his toes.


End file.
